​​So... does she remember that time that you fucked something up 20 years ago like it happened only 15 minutes ago? Does she give you that cold as ice, nut-shriveling death stare while insisting with gritted teeth that NOTHING is wrong? When you let out a belly laugh every time Moe pokes Curly between the eyes, does she say, "I don't get it, what the hell is so funny?!"

Yeah bro... I thought so.




Hence, this One-of-a-kind Survival Guide - chock full of tactical strategies created to help you coexist with those creatures of the opposite sex - while hopefully making you laugh your cojones off along the way. And who better to write this crucial piece of literature than than a humorist who has some how managed to survive close to three decades of marriage to the same woman. While they don't give out medals for this kind of valor, I can honestly say that without my twisted testosterone infused sense of humor, I wouldn't 

be alive today.

​                               ~ Godspeed,  Tommy Zman


​​Since the beginning of humanity, we men HAVE NEVER & WILL NEVER understand the women in our lives.     

And while that in itself is no earth shattering revelation, we continually try to appease these chesty creatures, doing everything in our power to make them happy - and there within lies the problem. That kind of mentality is like beating yourself over the head with a hammer because it feels so good when you stop. 

The MALE / FEMALE RELATIONSHIP will forever be a most painful enigma 

because trying to understand what women want

is like attempting to unravel a Rubik's cube in a fucking shark cage. We’re just hard wired so damned differently. Men act on their primal physical instincts, make quick decisions then move on. Women are ruled by their emotions turning an ordinary mundane bump in the road into a mind-numbing, drama filled detour through the depths of hell as we guys get dragged along through every single agonizing flaming turn.

​The Survival Guide to Save Mankind 


​​​tommy Zman's book


​Honey, Does This Make Me Look  Fat?